December 21st, 2011
O wait, here’s Captain M8s coming running in from another rume, looking serious. What have you found M8s, do you knoe where the Bob-omb is hidden?
“No, but I may have a lead on our other problem. The Antisnatter… might not be a threat to us any more.”
“I’ve been researching Mecha Snatter in the codex. I already knew Mecha Snatter was a terrifying festive juggernaut that has manifested in many different forms,”
like Drrrrrrrrrrrrrr Angelo?
“Well, sort-of, yes. Anyway the point is, each time he’s variously wiggled, waggled and otherwise destroyed, leaving nothing left of him, or something left, depending on the situation.”
well yeah. obviously he’s either destroyed or not destroyed at any given moment.
“No, but, you don’t understand. There was once a particularly horrible version of Mecha Snatter called Yulicron. Yulicron was bigger than the Earth, and it really looked like he was going to be able to blow up Christmas this time, but then…”
“I remember this!” nobbly has piped up. “Yeh I remember this, Snatter came back from way into the future and I was driving a big robot Old Snatter brought back to fight Mecha Snatter with, only we were nowhere near as big as he, so all we could do was wiggle he, and then… YES! I remember! Then our wiggling was super-powered due to a blast of superheated negabaryonic pentaquarkal energy!!!”
you what nobbly?
“Ok. Ok. So. The Antisnatter was exploded in an explosion of Christmas Star and Quantum Chocolate.”
“Never mind, MAGIC CHOCKLATE. He then came back, and blasted Old Snatter From The Future’s Space Ship with beems made from that same explosion power.”
“And that space ship was being a robot, and it was wiggling Mecha Snatter, and so the power of the christmas star quantum chocolate explode was wiggling right into Yulicron and… he WIGGLED AWAY!”
hehe, what. he went sashaying off into space swinging him hips, hehe?
“hehe no, I mean he wiggled into NOTHING. He DISSOLVED. hehe.”
“EXACTLY,” say M8s. “That’s exactly what I came here to say. When something dissolves, it isn’t GONE, it’s just that its cells and molecules are all spread out over a wide area! Mecha Snatter is still OUT there somewhere. Which means that when you chose Mecha Snatter as the form for the Antisnatter to take, that wasn’t an abstract idea, it was something that actually existed, right there and then! He didn’t appear in a new body, he’s become trapped in an ancient, dead one! The Antisnatter has manifested in the form of Mecha-Snatter… and Mecha-Snatter is a CLOUD OF DISSIPATED GASES! There’s just nothing he can do to us! Look! That’s him out there, that reddish haze in space!”
That’s who, Antisnatter or Mecha Snatter?
“Woe m8s calm down!” nobbly goe. “You look as excited as I’ve ever seen you!”
“I am! Don’t you see what this means?? We’re finally free! The Antisnatter, Mecha Snatter… both defeated! If it wasn’t for the fact that everyone in the galaxy is frozen in time, then Christmas would be able to go on unchallenged forever!!”
yeah and if it wasn’t for the fact that a bom’s following us around.
“Following who around?”
Tell him, nobbly
“Look,” go nobbly showing him the broken Bobombometer. “It says here that the bomb is right here, wherever we go.”
“What? That can’t be right, neither of you is carrying a Bob-Omb are you? I’m sure I’d have noticed.”
noe! no boms of any sort here! What a puzzle! Ooop, I can… oo I can feel another sparkle coming on… oooooo…
woo! And today’s chocolate is of… oe, that’s odd, today’s chocolate is of the weird advent calender machine.
sorry nobbly, yes quite right, the bobometer.
“Where did you get that??” goe M8s with concern in him voice. I dunnoe m8s I just found it in my stocking one day?
“GIVE IT TO ME.”
er.. noe m8s, it is our advent calender?
“IT’S GOT THE BOMB IN IT. GIVE IT TO ME NOW.”
oe noe! what, and you’ll get the bom out?
“THERE’S NO TIME!
WE HAVE TO JETTISON THE ADVENT CALENDAR!!”